Good morning!! Just for today, I'm going to start off with my announcements first instead of putting them at the end of the email, bc they are muy importante:
1. Tomorrow kicks off the Spring season of Central Park intenSati! It is a FREE, community class I teach that takes place INSIDE central park and we enter by columbus circle. Meet me at 9:45am for an exhilarating, amazing, refreshing, mind/body/spirit workout!! Bring friends :)
2. My class at Lex/63rd is cancelled tomorrow bc of the Easter Holiday. Class resumes next Sat., April 10th.
3. My mentor Patricia Moreno who created intenSati and wrote "the intenSati Method" is kicking off her Northeast Book Tour tomorrow afternoon! P will be talking about the keys personal transformation -- Are you ready, willing and able to change?! -- and all the info is found at: http://www.satilife.com/events.html
Now, back to my morning pages. :) Hi, I hope this finds you well and open to embrace today. It is a new day and it's going to be sunny, warm and beaaaautiful!!!
So, most of you know I teach intenSati at Park/33rd EQUINOX at 7am on Monday mornings. The average class attendance is 6, which is well below what the club Group FItness Manager wants and expects. Over the last 4 months, I have seen many students (regulars and newbies) come in and take class. Some return (YES) but many have not come back. It's been disheartening at times. That said, I've also taught brand new students and they've become regulars, which has been SO inspiring!!!
I'm not sure I could've stuck to intenSati in the beginning if I was so visible, which you are, to yourself and others, in a small class situation. It can be challenging, though very rewarding, and I do always say how strong and courageous students are for getting down to business with sometimes only 3 students in the class!
Now, I do my best to focus on gratitude for any number of student but I'm human (and relatively new to the group fitness world) so if I'm feeling and focusing on the lack or scarcity of the situation, it's just not a great attitude and energy to bring to class. I share about it sometimes and am blessed with students who lift me up, but I definitely get an EGO bruise when I show up and there are less than 6 student! I've also gone into FEAR and ruminate, "I don't want to lose this class, too!" and I get to thinking they don't like me, nobody in Murray Hill likes me, I don't like anybody in Murray Hill, I'll never build my own big classes but will have to rely on subbing, there aren't enough Sati students to go around, I'm not doing a good enough job or I need to lose 10 pounds bc in Murray Hill everybody is really skinny.
Nice. Nothing like an egocentric, fear-based intenSati instructor to start your week of RIGHT! :)
Rather than thinking about what I can give and how to serve, or being at peace with myself and what the situation looks like even as I seek expansion and growth for the class, I'm falling into insecurity trap. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out this can't possibly be creating the best intenSati environment! Or, at the very least, I need to work with that truth instead of pretending it's not there or else it becomes an elephant in the room, even if nobody can "see it" it can be felt and experienced intuitively.
So, do I want to stay with this class or let it go? Honestly. And if the answer is that I want to keep it, then I need to take responsibility and ask myself what to I have to do, right?! Have I really done all I could? Am I capable of changing my thoughts to create a new reality in the Park/33rd Street studio on Monday mornings?!
Well, this is my first day of my intention to do just that! I love teaching intenSati Monday morning, I DO, and I think it's a great club. It's close to where I work in midtown! I love the students that I am getting to know! I do believe I can build this class so it is a THRIVING group! So, YES, I'm going for it! I don't want to walk away from this time slot and club without saying I gave my all!!!!!
I ask you if there is something in which you're involved that doesn't feel like it's a real reflection of your best efforts and work. Is there a place where you can give more, release more (sometimes letting go is the work), learn new ways of approaching the situation?! Or, have you mentally checked out of the game and need to ask yourself if you still want to play?! Nobody is forcing you to do anything, right? Nobody's forcing me to continue teaching this class and if there comes a time that I don't want to do it anymore, I will release it and create space for a new and better opportunity. But, until or unless that day comes, it makes NO sense at all to play with one foot out the door.
Closing thought: When I choose to stay in the game I play with passion and faith! I believe in myself and my abilities! I will do my best and trust the results will be for the best!
I hope you have an amazing day!! I love hearing from you so please drop me a line anytime. No need to hit "reply all" you can just message me directly and I promise to write back soon!
With xo and GRATITUDE!! :) Lindsay